The Disneyland of Ibiza hippyness

(by Pablo Burgués)

Hi, my friends, today I’d like to tell you about the Pitiusan karma guardian, the mecca of Balearic mindfulness … Ladies and ladies, I ask you to give a big hand to Es Vedrá (which is that blurred and dark thing behind the no less blurred and dark Mike Oldfield).

It happens that this stunning islet located in front of the south west coast of Ibiza has always been a site of veneration and worship for the friends of mystery, who claim that this place is one of the greatest energy accumulation spots on the planet (just behind the Pyramids of Egypt and Stonehenge, that come to be the Leo Messi and the Cristiano Ronaldo of world energy power).

Es Vedrá legend began exactly a bloody long time ago, when in Ibiza the rumour began to circulate that no human being would ever be able to reach its summit ever. And you’re asking yourselves: why? Perhaps due to its steep 382 meters high? Maybe for the difficult climbing on its limestone rock? Perhaps because at that time Decathlon still didn’t exist? Perhaps because a giant goat sodomizes anyone who attempts it?... No, my friends, the official answer is even crazier than all this: because “who may try and be able to reach the summit would immediately be sex-changed”. I swear by Buda, Jesus Chris and Pitingo that I haven’t made this up, it’s a literal phrase taken from a text of that time.

Well, the first hominid who challenged the legend was a Carmelite priest named Francisco Palau y Quer, who in 1850 and a half got off to Es Vedrá for a mystical retreat (well, what nowadays we know as “behaving as a hippy”). Upon his return the guy claimed he had lived paranormal experiences and witnessed the apparitions of “ladies of light and celestial beings”. Today such statements wouldn’t surprise Ibiza people very much, as they know that all these supernatural experiences and even more occur daily in Amnesia, but at that time the news became a hit that just enlarged the islet’s legend.

But the most famous and media case was the Manises Case, which happened at 11 pm on July 11th 1979, or in other words, friends of the occult: at 11 pm on day 11 of month 11 at 1979 (1 + 9 + 7 – 9 = almost 11). Scary, isn’t it? Well, that fateful day an airliner flying from Mallorca to Canarias asked to make an emergency landing at Manises airport (Valencia). The reason for this unexpected manoeuvre was that the place was being chased by “several red light spots, that went up and down in an unconventional way and moved at a frenzied speed, unknown for any conventional plane”.

Once landed, the captain told that unidentified flying object began following them when they were flying over Ibiza island, just the same area where the year before a butane tanker ship claimed to have seen a rain of more than fifty UFOs: “In front of us some yellowish lights appeared, like flares, and they didn’t remain still”, declared the tanker’s captain.

After these two unquestionable and inexplicable sightings, the area began to be known as the Triangle of Silence, a sort of Spanish Bermuda Triangle that comprises the area demarcated by the Ifach rock in Alicante, the south west cost of Mallorca and Es Vedrá islet in Ibiza.

OK, certainly some days later it became known as it was published in press that the supposed UFOs seen by the ship were found to be a parachutist squad that was participating in the recording of a programme for Radio Nacional de España (Spain National Radio)… But as Iker Jiménez well said (and if he didn’t he should have): “These journalists that act to be serious are all a bunch of liars sons of bitches”.

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Translation: Dora Sales